I’ve witnessed many frustrations in my self since I first felt this ‘state’. Fear (at my fragility, vulnerability), anger (at the collapse of my previous ‘working’ state), depression (swirling negativity, hopelessness), and others. The first brutal reality for me was the lack of understanding. Only the close around me saw how bad this was.
However ‘advanced’ our culture may be, our language, (or our education of our language), still leaks like a sieve. ‘Burnout’ in the modern sense explains a range of experiences, ranging from a long Friday at work to complete emotional meltdown. Luckily, most haven’t seen the far end of this spectrum, but that does water down the understanding of the word.
The best explanation of this experience I have found is by comparing it’s symptoms with that of PTSD, (as in the TED presentation below, by Dr Geri Puleo). For me, many of these tally with my current state. It’s serious.
I’ve built myself to find solutions. In the capitalist, materialistic place that we reside, it’s the logical way to grow security. I am beginning to believe, though, that for some depth of spiritual issues, there may be no such refinement or straight answer. Or perhaps I am not ready to see it yet.
Prescriptions fail to allow for context, and error. Here I share only things I’ve tried, and their effects on me in this state of burnout.
Note: This is a fragment, unfinished and painfully still in progress!